Jesus, I Surrender Myself To You
Yesterday was Father’s Day.
My dad died on January 28th, so it was my first Father’s Day without him on this planet.
For the past month, grief has been particularly difficult for me.
I’m not really sure why.
I lost my appetite, couldn’t sleep, and felt literally weighed down by sadness.
I have to work so hard to hide my tears all throughout the day and act normal.
It’s almost been 5 months, why aren’t I over this?
People aren’t hugging me telling me they are praying for me anymore.
No more cards are waiting for me in the mail or on my desk.
Life is moving as fast as ever, like nothing happened.
It seems like I should be over this grief.
Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it. Matthew 10:39
I sat to read this coming Sunday’s Mass readings and to pray about what to write to you.
Once again, I am blown away by how Jesus cares for us.
I keep trying to “get over” the grief of losing my dad like there is a time limit to it.
I keep thinking, “I want my life back to normal.”
Jesus, I surrender myself to You.
I need to let go of what I think should be – me back to normal and surrender to what is – I’m grieving.
Jesus, I surrender myself to You.
Take care of everything.
Maybe Jesus is caring for you too through His words in this coming Sunday’s Gospel…
Blessings of Surrender!
